Right now the score stands with Lucas in the lead at 23-9 and me bringing up the rear and barely pushing .500 at 17-15. Let's see if I can pick up some ground this week:

CLE at TEN: TEN. Tim Couch is back for the Browns, but he's been suffering from a "dead arm" for the past month or so. Rumor had it that by the end of preseason he couldn't even throw the ball 10 yards down the field. *I* can throw a football 10 yards. I think I missed my window of opportunity to be an NFL quarterback. They get all the chicks.

NYJ at MIA: MIA. The Jets have won 8 in a row against Miami, but did you see them play last week? It was embarassing. Their leading rusher was their punter for goodness sake.

CAR at MIN: MIN. Rodney Peete has earned the starting job for the Panthers. He'll rack up big yardage again this week against a Minnesota defense with holes the size of swiss cheese, but I can't in good conscience pick Carolina to go 3-0.

KC at NE: NE. The Super Bowl Champs face a team that gave up 39 points to the Browns and lost to the Jaguars. That means it's prime time for a letup game, but I think the Pats could give up 6 turnovers and still win.

NO at CHI: NO. Lucky lucky lucky. The Bears have managed to sleepwalk through their first two games, but the luck runs out here. It's still too early in the season for Deuce McAllister to start tiring, but check back in a month or so. He'll be this year's LaDanian Tomlinson, you heard it here first.

DAL at PHI: PHI. Last week's victory was a mirage, the Cowboys still suck. And props to the Eagles for collectively shutting up the entire media about Steve Spurrier's fun 'n gun offense.

IND at HOU: IND. Oh it will be a long day for the Houston defense, although their offense might go nuts. Rookie QB or not, this one might be a shootout.

SD at AZ: SD. The Chargers are not as good as their 2-0 record indicates, but then again neither are the Cardinals as good as their 1-1. From now on the opponents of the Seahawks get picked automatically every week.

BUF at DEN: DEN. Drew Bledsoe can't win in Denver, he never could. Denver is playing way above their ability level, but should have a field day picking off Mr. Bledsoe.

GB at DET: GB. Detroit has lost their games by a combined score of 80-28, or something absurd like that. They can't lose them all, and Brett Favre has problems on turf, but the Lions haven't been good since the days of Wayne Fontes, Scott Mitchell, and Herman Moore. Terry Glenn games in a row without injury: 2. Glenn's impact on said games: 0.

WAS at SF: SF. In the preseason, Spurrier ran up the score on the Niners' third-string defense. Now they have to play their first-stringers, and there's a good chance we'll see Danny Wuerffel in this game. If we do, just chalk up the big "L".

SEA at NYG: NYG. The aforementioned Seahawks rule is in place, the Giants could run the ball backwards and still gain 150 yards on the ground.

CIN at ATL: ATL. Ah, the comical Bengals. Gus Frerotte must've thought he was Boomer Esiason when he threw that left handed pass last Sunday. The Bengals seemingly haven't had a winning record since Boomer was calling plays, and they won't get on the board this game even against the lowly Falcons.

STL at TB: TB. The Rams have shown me nothing except half-assed effort and a complete lack of execution. They traditionally have problems with Tampa, problems on grass, and problems on Monday night, and when you add all of these up, it probably means they will get their first win this week. But I'm not picking them anyway. Mike Martz is arrogant.