This weekend, as all of us WashUers are well aware due to the lack of parking, was Thurtene Carnival, organize by WashU's most elite and honorable society of blah blah blah. But all Thurtene-bashing aside, the carnival is a great event if only because it's one of the few times when we as a school provide something for the general community besides late-night noise violations and a reason for Schnucks to be open at 3 AM. Unfortunately, WashU's favorite alumni reporter Ben Westhoff doesn't think so. Why does Ben's job for the Riverfront Times consist solely of writing articles about WashU? Isn't this kind of a conflict of interest, especially when he starts interviewing friends and ex-girlfriends like did in the Famous Direct Connect Expose?

Anyway, this morning as I walked to the gym, this years fraternity pledge classes were busy taking their their elaborately rickety facades, some of which looked cool but others that looked like a strong win or direct sunlight would reduce them to a pile of duct tape and plywood.

At the same time, the strip of grass and sidewalk between frat row and the tennis courts was littered with empty beer cans from the weekend of senseless drinking (despite the fact that there was a garbage can approximately every three feet along the row). The most disgusting part, though, was the group of 2 or 3 Theta Xi "brothers" who were lounging at a picnic table completely covered with empty cans and bottles watching like spoiled brats while Top Care workers picked up the cans and trash on their lawn.

If fraternities want to live in their own filth, which -- judging by the condition of the row whenever I walk by -- they clearly do, they should be allowed to do so. Why should the employees paid for out of other students' tuition dollars spend time time every weekend cleaning up pile after pile of beer cans from [insert inappropriate theme here] frat party? If I were them, I would pick up the cans, bring them inside, and dump them all on the floor or in the hallways of the frat houses. Perhaps then the "brothers" would summon up the ability to get their garbage in the trash cans (or, more likely, make their pledges clean up after them).

Homer: [scribbling furiously] "Garbage in garbage cans. Hmm...makes sense."