My family is going on a wild goose chase for the next few days, so I won't have internet access for awhile. As such, I need to do my NFL picks a couple of days early. The standings right now are:

Lucas: 10-6 (151-90)
Me: 7-9 (138-103)

PHI at NYG: PHI. I still contend that the schizophrenic Giants won't make the playoffs.

KC at OAK: OAK. Team Choke got too many home games this year to really pull off their usual collapse. Plus the Chiefs are decimated by injuries.

BAL at PIT: BAL. It's so hard for me to accurately pick the Ravens games, they're my version of how the Titans are for Lucas. Damn mediocre teams.

DAL at WAS: WAS. Another clunker for the Cowboys. Why are they in every crappy boring game that takes place?

TEN at HOU: TEN. Finally I can safely pick the outcome of a Titans game.

CIN at BUF: BUF. Not that Drew Bledsoe has played well in the last month, but the Bengals aren't going to win two in a row.

ATL at CLE: ATL. I know a lot of NFC teams that are scared to death of the Falcons right now. Any team besides Tampa Bay better hope to God that they don't have to play Michael Vick in the playoffs.

MIN at DET: MIN. The Vikes have been playing well lately. The Lions haven't played well since the Scott Mitchell to Herman Moore era.

MIA at NE: NE. Did anyone watch the Pats game last week and notice a striking similarity to the Rams in terms of horrendous offensive line play and lack of offensive game plan? You can almost see Charlie Weis throwing his hands up in the air, as it's hard to call any interesting plays when your QB has half a second before he's running for his life or on his back.

CAR at NO: NO. At home with their backs to the wall, Jim Haslett will kill somebody if the Saints don't win.

JAX at IND: IND. Both of these teams let me down last week, therefore I will pick neither. I can't do that? Eh, I'll pick the Colts then.

GB at NYJ: GB. All I heard about last week was how wonderful Chad Pennington is, despite the fact that he looks like he's about 12 and sounds like he was born in a swamp and married his cousin. Brett Favre better show the rookie who the most talented hick QB in the league is.

AZ at DEN: DEN. They may suck, but it's the Cardinals. At least it's not another embarassing 8,000-person home game.

SEA at SD: SEA. That choking sound you hear is the Chargers for the second year in a row.

TB at CHI: TB. Actually the Bucs may want to lose this one on purpose, since a 4 seed would almost guarantee them of playing Atlanta in the first round.

SF at STL: SF. 49ers: not playing any of their starters. Rams: can't play any of their offensive starters since they've all been injured thanks to John St. Clair.