Last night I walked into Lien Dormitory and saw possibly the oddest sight I have ever seen. A whole gaggle of Pi Beta Phi sorority girls were wearing camouflage pants, tank tops, and bandandas, and had "G.I. Hoe's" written on their arms in marker. They were, of course, preparing for an evening at World War III, the largest and loudest of the frat parties.

I say loudest because last year I awoke one morning to the sounds of gunfire and bombs blasting throughout campus. Once I shook the cobwebs out of my head and assured myself that the nation had not been plunged into global thermonuclear war, I ventured outside and found that the source of the sound was, of course, fraternity row. This year in an effort to be a bit more tasteful there were no war noises, but instead there was loud music at 7:30 in the morning that could be heard clear across campus.

But back to the Pi Phis. Apparently it is tradition for these particular sorority girls to dress their pledges in crazy getups and throw them into the sea of undersexed underclassmen for World War III. Some of the girls were clearly quite at home with the notion, while others were not as ecstatic about being groped and gawked at. For this reason, the older Pi Phis were actually running the event like boot camp. The girls were even forced to line up and march over to the party.

This crazy event came ironically during the culmination of Engineering Scholarship Weekend, during which the brightest pre-freshman minds compete. Just when I interview 12 of the smartest and most interesting people I have ever met and start thinking that I will eventually leave WashU in capable hands, I have to go and see a spectacle like this that leaves me with more doubt than ever.